dreamsofbaby

08:53 pm: Here goes...
So this is my first entry to livejournal. I am using this as a trying to conceive journal mostly. I have found that I could use a place to talk about my spouse's and my efforts trying to conceive where I can get some hopefully positive reinforcement. It is one of the most difficult things I have ever had to deal with emotionally. I know it may sound trivial, but unless you've been there, you can't possibly imagine how trying it is. So let me get you caught up...

My husband and I made the decision to start trying to conceive in January of this year so I went off of the pill. I was naive enough to assume that I would probably be pregnant within six months or so. I didn't even have my first period after going off of the pill until July. I was frustrated, but everything I read online about going off of birth control basically said that sometimes it takes up to six months and all you can do is wait. So I did just that. Once my first period started, I thought, "OK, now we can get started!"

August came and went with no period. I decided to schedule a pre-pregnancy exam to see if something was wrong. I saw my doctor in early September. She did an exam and said that everything looked normal. Because of my periods, she decided to put me on Provera and wait until day 3 of my cycle to run some hormone tests. Ten days of Provera, five days on waiting for my period, and then three days into my period I went back. The bloodwork was drawn.

I met with the doctor again to discuss the results. She said that my hormone levels are right around where they should be. There is no physical reason why I shouldn't be able to conceive, but given that my periods are once every four or five months on average when I'm not on birth control, it would probably take a long time unless I get some medicinal help. She told me to wait two weeks with no intercourse, take a pregnancy test, and if it came back negative, to start Provera for ten days again and then we would try 50mg Clomid on cycle days 3-7 and see if it induced ovulation.

I followed her instructions. I was really hoping that since nothing was physically wrong with me keeping me from ovulating, that maybe the slightest nudge would make it happen. I went back on cycle day 23 for more hormone testing. The tests came back on the borderline. They couldn't tell if I had ovulated or not. I spent several days playing phone tag with my doc to find out what the next step is. We finally talked last week.

She prescribed another 10 day supply of Provera and 100mg Clomid on days 3-7. I started this round of Provera on Saturday, so I'm on day 4 of Provera waiting for my next chance to try to conceive. That should bring everyone up to speed on what's going on with the whole process.

The whole thing is so frustrating. I thought I would be pregnant by now. Here it is, going on a year since I went off of birth control and I feel like I still have such a long way to go. We haven't even figured out how to get my body to ovulate yet. I want a baby so badly. I just keep hoping that each thing we try will work. I know I've only been on medicine for one cycle and I need to patient, but it can be so difficult getting myself in that mindset. Anyway, I hope that anyone that can relate will read this journal and let me know about your experiences. I'm sure it would help hearing from others that have been through the same thing.